Standup at Grovewood Bar

Stand and Deliver With Bill Squire

Stand and Deliver with Bill Squire

Shameless plug to another thing

Hey, if you stumble across this blog and you're interested I also have a podcast over at

http://adhomattackshow.podbean.com/feed/

On The Issue of Vending Machines In Schools

I'm tired of politician's wives telling me my kids need to exercise more like they're training for the Olympics while their better half makes weird deals with soda companies to pass laws that let them put cans of sugar acid in vending machines next to the water fountain.Then people tell you to teach them better choices and let the free market do whatever it wants. I'm trying to teach them better choices but they're teenagers. I'm a little busy trying to keep them from beating off all over the house and not developing any crazy fetishes. I'm sorry I can't hold their hand all day and keep them from choosing a cold can of sweet sugary nectar over piss warm water.
 I'd need to clear the security every morning we have to  have there to keep guys from shooting up the place. Also. I'd need another source of income. Probably some socialist bullshit like Welfare or unemployment or social security. Maybe all parents should do this. Maybe they should carry guns and a good guy badge too all day and we can walk around protecting our kids from bad things at gunpoint. DOESN'T THAT SOUND GREAT?

OR this group of  partisan hacks that keep getting re-elected for decades at a time could quit making shady deals with corporations and I can keep working and they can keep learning. Leave that bullshit at the store where I do have time to go with them.
Oh and maybe let the wife run for an office instead of giving her cutesy government programs to be the pretty face of. Not cool that your woman is your fall guy for stressed out parents.

While we're here maybe cut it out with all the campaign money. You don't need all that to get a word out anymore. Have you seen youtube? A guy got millions of views on there just by repeating WHAT WHAT IN MY BUTT a bunch of times. It was weird. Cultural phenom level. Maybe try being interesting and honest with people and quit talking like an asshole all the time.